I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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