The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I can tuck mytits in my pants
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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