I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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