tell your sister to shave her snatch
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.