Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize