you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize
