my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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