I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
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