She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I have so many feelings about this burrito
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
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