Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Randomize
