physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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