I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
