maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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