dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
