i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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