I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Randomize