i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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