Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Randomize
