he was CRYING into my vagina
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize
