I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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