Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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