Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
