My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
I have surprise drugs for everyone
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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