Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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