Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize