Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
