Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
