Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
I will never try to masturbate with americas funniest home videos playing in the background ever again
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
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