Where did you get a picture of my penis
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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