i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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