Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Randomize
