I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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