How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
just imagine me sitting naked on a toilet with a fully-clothed dude i havent seen in 2 years, trying to make normal conversation except that im covered in blood and he's helping wipe me down while i try not to pass out because blood makes me NERVOUS. And he's apologizing and i'm apologizing.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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