I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
The dick lei will go down in squad history
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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