K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Randomize
