Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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