super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I just forgot I was standing up.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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