SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize