I'm gonna have a badass scar
Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
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