Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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