One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
