I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Randomize
