oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I used a jello pudding cup as a shot chaser last night. I'm the Bill Cosby of alcoholics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize