anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
i gave him the "yep, i was your girfriend's collegiate lesbian sex story" head nod
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Actions speak louder than pants.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Randomize
