**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
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