I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Me too!
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
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