My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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