her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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