How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
