i already hear my dad disowning me
This show inspires me to have sex in space
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
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