I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
I don't know if it's her mysterious past or atrocious grammar, but I think I'm in love.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
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